On Love and Loss...

I've been sitting in the waiting room at University Hospital all afternoon trying to be supportive for my daughter who has gone into labor early with a child that we know has multiple birth defects and will not be able to remain with us.

So much love fills this room; our family has taken over the waiting area and we all take turns going in to see Kayla. All of my grand-daughters are here, playing together with toys they've brought, our phones, and the books left in the waiting area. These cousins all love each other so much; it's a joy to watch them. My oldest daughter is here; she's come to comfort her sister and has brought her own newborn for me to hold while she goes in to hold Kayla's hand.

When Kayla first told me about this baby I searched to find meaning and purpose...why did this child need to come to Earth for such a brief time? What were we supposed to learn? This is what I have learned as I have reflected, watched and listened.

Kayla has found out how many people truly love her and she has been able to be supportive and inspirational to many others as she has posted her thoughts and feelings about her journey each day for months. She has also decided to use her talents to bless the lives of others faced with the loss of a chid. This has helped her (and will continue to help her) heal and accept what has happened.

I've found my own purpose in this through a post of a friend. Just today she shared a story about a family who donated, in their son's memory, to an organization called Room to Read. The article really touched me because I want all children, everywhere to have access to books. So, because of all of the books that I will not be able to read to Elly and because of all of the stories I will have the opportunity to share with Shyann, Saydee, Kate, Sammy, Haley, Naomee, Lexy and Harmony I'll donate to Room to Read so that all of the kids who are still waiting for a book might finally be able to receive one.

If you visit the site (http://www.roomtoread.org) and feel inspired, please join me.

Started our first day of vacation on a road trip today , bound for Seattle with Charity and Ben in the Jag . So far it's been fun chatting with each other , sharing memories and laughing!
Some amusing moments:

We are staying at a real dive in Baker City, Oregon. I checked in, we went to the room and discovered one bed for the three of us ! I went back to registration and asked to be moved to a larger room to which they replied that they could upgrade my room but I would have to pay the difference! I wasn't going for that at all. :) I said, "no I'm not paying the difference, I stated how many people there were when I booked the room and was quoted a price, which I pre -paid." I received my new room, no extra charge. :)

Next ,we decided to make use of the hot tub. It was nice and hot , very relaxing until I noticed what looked like a mustache floating around in the water! There were a couple of these floating around near the filter..., needless to say , yuck! We left.

Waiting to see what amusing surprises are waiting for us tomorrow.